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Dear Diary,

The past few weeks I’ve been rushed off my paws. What with catching moths, supervising the bark-machine known as Mr Rott Weiler next door (supervising from a distance), and demanding tribute from Tall Things who suddenly seemed to all be offering my Turkey bones, it’s been all rush and fur washing.

cat on Audi, focus on Audi logo

I love my Audi

For a while, my favourite piece of furniture, this shiny Audi, disappeared from my Kingdom (an office car park). Was it stolen, or some was it some kind of prank by the Tall Thing that takes it to be cleaned every night? I don’t know, but they need to ask me about that kind of thing, really.

In other news, I haven’t spotted my girlfriend Pippa for weeks. I have a feeling she’s staying warm indoors because of all this chilly weather. My destiny lies elsewhere. When I next see her, I need to have a chat with her about the majesty of the Great Outdoors.